Some Complaints

I started blogging for two main reasons. There were a couple of bloggers that I really enjoyed so I wanted to participate in the community and I missed writing in college. I wanted a place where I could continue writing every day.

But since getting more into the blogging world, I’ve become less and less convinced the internet is a haven for introverts. I suppose I thought that under the mask on the web, where we don’t have to actually face to face communicate, people would be more willing to be open, present interesting thoughts to each other, be supportive in ways that is hard for less outgoing people to be in real life.

Instead I feel like I’ve been walking in the fakest high school drama.

There was a little ripple in the mommy blog community a couple of weeks ago when Camp Patton changed her blog to private. I think the general consensus was that she had been receiving some nasty comments? Either way, criticism of the website GOMI quickly circled around, with bloggers chastising the nasty comments people were making about them on this website. “People just need to get a life instead of criticizing others!” “How can some people be so nasty?” “Some people are just jealous!”

I went to GOMI fully expecting some pretty nasty trolling. But instead I found forums of women who genuinely like and read parenting/lifestyle blogs but wanted a place where they could collectively roll their eyes at some of the stuff these bloggers post. And I laughed. I laughed and laughed and laughed because I could not agree more with what a lot of what these women were saying.

Yes, LocalMilk is wanting to be some grey scale Gwyneth Paltrow and posts absolutely horrendous recipes

Yes, PrudentHomemaker is clearly doing a lot better financially than she used to be despite her claims to the opposite

Yes, Penelope Trunk is a huge attention magnet (but we all still love her)

Yes, I am so tired of women thinking they’re talented because people buy their overpriced leggings and prints with trite sayings on them that are all written in that exact same semi-cursive scrawl. (I saw someone on instagram post an ink watercolor of a variegated leaf. It literally took them probably four brush strokes and was something my eight year old could absolutely do. All the comments: “Sell please!! **kissy face.**)

Yes, I am tired of food blogs where you make the recipes at home and they taste like crap (this is why making an actual cookbook takes years. Blogger doesn’t have a cookbook with good reviews? Don’t make their food!)

Yes, I am tired of grown women writing like they’re in middle school. “Youse guyz….I can’t even….nom nom nom….”

Yes, I’m tired of very wealthy women, or women who are getting items for free, pushing me to buy 40 dollar shirts for my four year old. Redcreekhandmade, you’re adorable, but seriously, who can afford to have their child destroy a linen romper that costs that much?

Yes, I’m tired of women with their DSLR telling me it’s so easy to get great shots!

Yes, I’m tired of humble bragging…”The light wasn’t perfect and it’s a tad blurry, but I just had to share this picture!” over gorgeous portrait. “It’s been such a crazy and hectic day! I feel like I couldn’t get anything done! So instead we baked this pie with the blueberries we picked this morning and now we’re going to take a tub and cuddle!”

Yes, I am tired of posts where the post title has nothing to do with the post and it is a short ramble about…I’m not really sure what….

There are lots of fantastic blogs out there. There are lot of women and men who do a fantastic, professional level job. There are others who are fun to talk to because they’re just online to share with close people, writing their life for posterity. And there are others who hide in the internet world because they’re too easily called out on the BS in the real world. Some of them I still like, looking at you Penelope, but most are….well, I’m over it.

I’ve lost interest in a lot of this because there is a shocking lack of people with children over the age of 7 or so doing it. I think that should give some hint as to how cultivated and manufactured a lot of these people’s lives are. I’ve seen several people post pictures or write posts talking about how their children brought them their favorite stuffed animal, or was packing their suitcase, and it’s always some super expensive, chintzy looking, handmade toys/clothes and I think BS. You ask any four year old to give you their favorite toy and its going to be some atrocious light up plastic thing. I get that doesn’t make a nice picture. We all like to take aesthetically pleasing photos or write nice stories. But then just say, “I love this!” instead of lying about how cultured, sensitive, and artisianally appreciative your child is.

Once a child gets to a certain age though, it’s hard to hide what children are really like. It becomes impossible to get a good photo of them, hence why I love taking baby pictures, but it’s even more impossible to get them to do things and say things and wear things that you can then post for other adults to admire. You can’t blog about making fairy crowns with your eight year old when they’re in school all day. You can’t blog at all when your four+ kids who all used to take daily naps are suddenly needing to be driven all over the place for activities and are making messes and playing with their friends and having their own lives. It’s easy writing homeschool posts for preschoolers where you do one activity together but it gets much harder when you’re spending hours doing math with multiple children.

Anyway. Be wary of those who share their lives too readily. The most tender moments of your lives with your family are not something that should be shared with 3k followers. That’s little better than reality stars. And I’m not longer sorry for not posting as much. In fact, I’m kind of glad I don’t.

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